I just fired up my dusty treadmill and smashed 30 minutes at a 3.2 clip at a level 1 incline and the only reason I don’t have a slightly flushed selfie to post is because the lighting in my lower level is disastrous.

Let the haters hate, I’m BAAACK!

When I ran my first “I’m taking this seriously and not eating donuts before I sorta run but mostly walk” 5K in preparation for a half marathon, I was feeling real good about myself. I had been training for about a month and had purchased new, insanely expensive running shoes. It should also be noted that I had charged a few Nike running outfits that not only wicked away sweat, but also looked flattering on my thighs.

I was in it to win it, friends.

Running at a descent clip, something odd happened. A woman, at least double my age, ran past me.

But that’s not the worst part.

She had a significant limp. Like a swinging, swaying, side to side, pop and lock kinda limp.

It gets worse.

She was dressed in a t-shirt that said “Bob’s Rib Shack” and was wearing green shorts with pleats. Like shorts you could wear to church if you wanted.

There’s more.

She was carrying an old plastic milk gallon filled with water.

… while running a 5K!!

She was really ticking me off.

I kicked it into high gear and zipped past her. Never mind my lungs were burning. MY PRIDE WAS ON THE LINE!

No less than 2 minutes later, Crazy McGee passed me AGAIN.

After awhile she got so far ahead of me, she was gone.

I guess my point is, there’s lots of pretenders. We got the look down, the image right. We stop to take sweaty selfies and use the hashtag #painispleasure. Unsurprisingly, those selfies start to taper off. We wanted the attention, not the bandaid nipples.

Then there’s Crazy McGee (at least I hope that’s her name), who just gets the job done. Image is irrelevant, limp is what it is, and she’ll carry her own water, thanks.

I’m hungry for more McGees. With so many images of the perfect parents, perfect hustlers, perfect activists, perfect … whatever … there are real people, running right past us, just getting the job done already.

And they don’t need our thumbs up to do it, either. Apparently, just a gallon of water.

Forever yours,