Just Don’t Be Too Busy To Read This, K?
I’m really busy. Like so busy, I only have time to post how busy I am on Facebook and then keep hitting refresh to see who’s liking and commenting on my status, and then like – for real. I gotta go.
Maybe I have time for one more Buzzfeed quiz, but then for real, you guys!
Some say with technology and American ideals for success, we’re the busiest we’ve ever been. Maybe. But I bet trying to raise a family during the medieval times wasn’t all hammocks and margaritas. And, as far as I know, the pioneers on the Oregon Trail had a real hard time making it to happy hour.
I think humans are wired for purpose and always have been. If we don’t spend time on the things we need to nourish ourselves physically (survival), emotionally (community) and spiritually (purpose) – we’ll fill the void(s) with something.
Like a “Little Couple” marathon. And I speak from experience, thank you very much.
Isn’t it weird how we tend to get all braggy about being busy? Like we’re about to get knighted by the King of Hustle or something?
And am I wrong to assume the King of Hustle would probably look like Master P?
Let’s be real – busy isn’t living with purpose, it’s living with stress. And a family sized bag of Peanut M&Ms for those of us who eat our feelings.
There are a lot of motivational quotes out there and tons of celebrities talking about the grind. “Work harder than everyone else so you can someday live like no one else,” kinda thing.
I like that. As someone who feels like she works 24/7, forsaking my health and my friendships at times, I also get that.
But, I’m a little concerned that instead of being inspired by these messages, some people (hello, mothers of small children?) will perceive the workload of success to be an impossible feat that will keep their dream, well, a dream.
That’s easy to do when moguls like P. Diddy used to brag about sleeping for 3 hours and working 18. Money never sleeps, you guys, ok? Diddy said so.
Color me surprised when in a recent interview he admitted to having a sleeping disorder and that his old grind was torture and caused him to fall asleep during important meetings.
Thanks a lot, Diddy. It would have been nice to tell me you had a disorder before making me feel inadequate, mmkay?
I read another article outlining the schedules of successful women. It was supposed to be an inspirational piece. The typical schedule read like this: Wake up around 5:00 am, take kids to school, work, pick kids up from school and have dinner, work some more, then lights out at midnight.
Hold up. Did you just say you get 5 hours of a sleep a night?
Oh, come on! Give me and my coffee maker a freaking break!
What these “sleepless” messages say to me is, “Success is having a touch of OCD and only seeing your family on special occasions while wearing expensive power suits.”
Sometimes, “Success is just keeping everybody alive until bed time while wearing your favorite stained yoga pants with the hole in the crotch.”
Attempting to be perfect is chasing an impossible dream. Attempting to do something that matters is the dream.
The path to our purpose isn’t elusive and destructive. It’s peaceful and nourishing. It isn’t busy, it’s focused.
Stained yoga pants are the new power suit.
Now, that doesn’t mean chasing our dreams feels like a luxurious nap. We will pull all nighters. We may need weeks, or even months at a grinding pace to get where we need to go. We may need to call in reinforcements like baby sitters, grandmas and the pizza guy.
But this money never (ever?) sleeps hustle? That, in my humble opinion, has zero to do with living a life with purpose and everything to do with feeding an insatiable ego with something to prove.
So where does that leave us?
It’s different for everyone, but know this: There will be time for rest. There will be time for your closest friends and family. There will be time for your purpose.
You probably won’t have time for a Netflix binge.
You may need to get off the PTA.
Your girlfriend may need to start paying a real counselor instead of calling you every morning for free. (Or, start charging her. Remember, think like an entrepreneur!)
And, a lesson I learned the hard way – when you allot 3 hours to work on your dream, 1 hour of it probably shouldn’t be spent watching YouTube videos of a baby bulldog rolling down a hill on repeat.
Busy is a given. What we’re busy doing is what matters.
I was challenged last week to create non-negotiable time for my writing – even if it’s just the first 10 minutes of my morning.
Why? Because we owe it to ourselves and to others to dedicate our time to what matters.
My true passion is this, right here – fellowship with all of you reading, right now. I haven’t written on this blog for almost two weeks because I didn’t allow myself the time. I had a really good excuse, too. HooHas keeps me freaking busy!
But my mind would always trail right back here.
Because I love it here. I feel called here.
The truth is, I did have the time. And I was wasting a lot of it.
Let’s get brutally honest. If I’m still and listen, a truth emerges. While it’s true, I am busy – another truth is that I’m not totally sure what I’m doing with this space quite yet.
When I don’t know what I’m doing, I feel fear.
If you can’t create the time for your purpose, even just a few moments with a cup of coffee before your family wakes, then stop. Be still. Let your truth bubble to the surface.
… what if I make the time … what if I make the sacrifice … what if … it doesn’t pan out like I had hoped?
Maybe it’s not time you’re lacking. Maybe it’s courage.
I know you’re busy, I am too. But if you don’t make the time for what you were put here to do, you deprive me of your gifts.
And that just makes me mad.
Someone needs what only you can give.
What a tragedy if you couldn’t find the
time courage to give it. Even in your stained yoga pants.